Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Genetic Testing

Yesterday, Christopher left his doctor's appointment with them scratching their heads. Christopher's numbers have gone up yet again, which makes no sense to them what so ever. In the three months that had pasted between CT Scans his numbers jumped 600 points and they prepared us for growth. However, that was no the news we got (more head scratching) - we got it's stable and not growing. Then yesterday more news of numbers going up, but no growth....

So they took some blood and sending it out to California for genetic testing. They are trying to see if Christopher has this certain mutated gene that happens in about 30% of people who have cancer. Which means that he has a 70% chance of not having this mutated thingy. The doctors are hoping this will shed some light on the reason his numbers are going up, but that there is no growth.

My personal thoughts are that this herbal stuff he is on is causing his numbers to go up. From everything that I have read, the CEA numbers measure cancer bi-product in the blood (doesn't mean if it's alive or dead bi-product, just what's floating around). So could it be that the herbal stuff is working an breaking up the cancer and while it leaves a wake in it's path his numbers go up.

So again Christopher has doctor's scratching parts of their bodies and wondering - "what the..." We will find out about the gene in about a week, so I will keep you all posted.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

CT Scan and Chemo Update

Last night Christopher and I sat down and prayed a little longer and a little harder - this morning we would find out the results of Christopher's CT scan. It was about three months since his last CT scan and we were both a little nervous. The previous CT Scans had come back with "shrinkage and growth, but with an even amount of shrinkage to growth". In addition, over the past month we have watched his CEA numbers go up a little. Which normally would mean that the cancer is growing and finding a way around the chemo drugs.

However, Christopher has been a new herbal routine for the past two months-ish and everything I had read on this stuff was that his numbers would jump up when this stuff starts to kick in. So we prayed last night that this would be the reason for the jump in the numbers.

Today when Christopher went in for chemo the doctor sat down with him and said - "Well, it's stable. There is no growth what so ever, but there is no shrinkage either. And I have no reason for why your numbers went up." When Christopher called to tell me the news, I had to exclaim "Thank you Lord for you great goodness and mercy." This truly is a miracle in my eyes, but I know it's not over either. The cancer could figure out a way around the treatments; just the thought of word "stable" and "no growth" is a blessing in it's own right.

Christopher's doctor plans on taking his CEA numbers in two weeks to see were they are at. If the numbers remain the same Christopher will stay on the current chemo drugs he's on. If his numbers do happen to go up, he will switch Christopher to a new chemo drug.

Christopher and I are both elated with the new news of "stable" even if that news changes in month or so - the idea of no growth is wonderful!

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Really?!....

I've rolled this around in my head and thought I would share a very strange and awkward moment I had a few weeks ago. But before we begin a little back ground info.

In the office building I work in there is a little deli run by a very outspoken little Asian woman. When I was pregnant she would tell me daily that I was so big I MUST be having a boy, and then the next day I would go down there - I was so big I MUST be having a girl. And later my office mates told me that one day they were down there and there was another prego woman getting some lunch and she looked at this woman asked her when she was due, what she was having and then told her that there was another woman who worked in the building and "she big, real big, she have twins and just don't know it." The boys knew - she was talking about me; she had the twin part wrong, oh and the girl part too. Nice lady, but there is a bit of a language barrier or cultural barrier - I just haven't figured out which.

So lets speed up to a few weeks ago, I ran down to the deli to get a coke. Most of the time I grab a can and put my money on the counter and tell them to have a good day because the deli is always packed with people waiting for a sandwich or something to be made. This day was different, there was no one in the deli. I get my coke, pull the exact change out of my pocket, look up and start to say, "have a great..."

"Oh hyi, you baby, he getting big right?" she yells across the counter to me. The first thought that runs into my head, is that I have a deadline that I'm trying to meet and she wants small talk - really could we do this another time.

So I reply, "yes, he's growing like a weed," then smile and head for the door. However, I only make it one step when she asks another question.

"So when you have another baby?"

One eye brow raises. Really, she didn't just ask me that. Seriously. I'm sure I looked like a deer in headlights right before they are run over by the mac truck on route 66. While I tried to roll around the right way to answer this question - which by the way - there is no right way, she throws another question at me.

"You want 'nother baby right?"

Good grief lady, now I was thinking of ways I could just run for the door. Would it be rude, to just walk out - she's going to see me again when I come down for another Coke in a day or two. So I quickly said, "oh yes, more children would be nice." My next thoughts were to smile and get the heck out of dodge. This line of questioning was just awkward and odd for anyone.

I got two steps forward when she asks, "oh, you husbund, he no want more kids?" It was at that point that I took a deep breath and threw the card I hold on to for special situations that need a quick out.

"My husband has cancer. I'm not sure if we will have more children." Then there was silence. I thought, I got her, I can go on my merry way and as I took another step...

"Tisk, tisk, tisk, oh that too bad. Too bad. Where is cancer in his body?"

Really lady, really, you have got to be kidding me! All I could think of was, she was going to hold me here with my Coke dipping water on me until I explain my life, Christopher's treatments, Ethan's views on the matter and how it might have all happened.

So I turned to her and thought of all the nice ways to put things, all the mean ways to put things and all the places I would like put things. But then I thought, she was just trying to be nice and sociable - in a very word vomit sorta way. I took a deep breath and explained in one large exhale.

"A little over a year ago, cancer was found in my husbands colon and liver, he's going through chemo, right now and we are dealing with it one day at a time, he feels great and is doing great considering that every two weeks he gets toxic drugs pumped into his body and asked to endure it with a smile, is there anything else you would like to know before I head back to work?" I grined after I said it - it's not what I wanted to say, but it's what came out of my mouth.

She looked at me for only a split second before, "oh ok, good, at least he doing good and want more babies." It was at that point that I was guessing that was the end of our conversation and I exited the deli.

Now you might ask - have I gone back to the deli since then. Oh yes, several times and she asks each time, "you husbund ok, still get drugs pumped into him?" I know she cares, but really!

Moral of the story: Don't ask total strangers personal questions.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Conversations with Ethan

I have to say one of the best times I have is when Ethan and I get to converse, which for the most part is a one sided conversation. However, there are days like yesterday that make me smile when Ethan shows off his conversing skills. :}

Let me set the stage. We pull into the driveway, I turn off the car, look in the back seat and ask Ethan, "Ready to get out?" I was greeted with a smile and, "Si!" (Don't ask where the Spanish comes into play? Christopher and I both have no clue.)

We go into the house where Ethan stops right in front of the dryer, opens it up and pulls out his swim trunks. Now you might ask how he knew his trunks were in the drier - I don't have an answer but I can tell you one eye brow lifted when I saw this. I looked at him and said, "those are your shorts, what are you going to do with them?"

And grin came over his face, which if you must know is the exact same look Christopher gets when he's up to no good. Ethan then ran into the living room, took his shoes off and tried to pull his shorts off. However, he has not mastered taking his bottoms off (the diaper keeps them on!) So while I stood there looking at my son rolling on the floor trying to take his shorts off and listening to him yell "Auff, auff, auff, mama, auff."

As I knelt down, I was presented with two feet (code for, take my pants off, "peasss."). After replacing Ethan's shorts with his swim trunks, he grabbed his motorcycle and headed for the front door. All the while I'm still standing in one place, I look at him and say, "hey, Ethan, where do you think....."

Before I had a chance to finish my sentence, I heard "ou, peas". So I thought, let's see where he wants to go. As I walked to the front door, Ethan pointed vigorously at the front door, "um, go, um go! ou, peas." (I opened the door) "Pha phu" (that's Ethan's way of saying thank you).

And off he went, the little Muppet wanted to go the water park! He went right down the walkway turned the corner and headed for the park near our house. "Yeah!" and clapping is what I heard when he saw the water going on and off at the park.

Amazing how he knew that he had to put his swim trunks on to go the water park and that he knew right where the water park was! Our little man is growing up. And with that grin, big dark eyes and devilish smile - Christopher and I are headed for a world of trouble!