Deanna, our talented photographer, whom shot Ethan's one year photos emailed me the other day letting me know that our photos where ready. As I was putting some of them up in frames I remembered back to an email Deanne wrote to me about how she was "giggling" over the faces that Christopher and Ethan made, because they are the exact same! And as I sat there going threw them I had to giggle to my self too (I even pulled out some photos that I had taken of them and yep, they do, they have the same expression on their face - "their eyebrows operate in the same manor").
It made me think of how our children are small versions of our selves reflected back to us through God. If we were to sit and look at our children deeply, we would learn so much about our selves. I watched Ethan today pick up his sandals, walk over to me and plopped down into my lap (that's code for "Mummy, I would like my shoes on please.") While putting them on I could see his little grin grow and once I was done, he stood up and trotted all around the house as if he was trying to do his best Frankenstein impression. He was so proud of the fact that he had his shoes on and he commanded them to do his bidding - *stomp, stomp, stomp*. It made me think, when was the last time any of us took pride in the small steps we take in life.
One day at work I wasn't having the greatest of days, I was running late, press checks all day long, driving back and forth and back again. At the end of the day my feet were killing me from my 3" heels (yea don't ask, I'll never wear those to work again) and as I stepped off the elevator the gentleman in there with me held the doors open and said, "have a good afternoon, a great day and God bless you". I smiled and said, "thank you" and wished him the same. However, as I walked back to the office, suddenly my day was all better. I could have cared less that I drove over 150 miles that day, ran from press house to press house, playing good cop bad cop with printers - someone took time out of their day to wish me a good day. Then it dawned on me; when was the last time I said "hi" to a total stranger and it help them make their day, to make them as happy as Ethan was with his shoes on trotting around the house?
So I ask those who read Living Strong. Today living strong means reaching out to others to help them smile. Reach out to those strangers around you and take pride in the small steps we take in life. :}
Friday, August 31, 2007
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Long Live New Orleans
Two years ago I got a phone call from my father at about 6:30am, "sweetheart, the levees broke". I think I responded with, "ok, thanks for letting me know" and then five minutes later it hit me. Broken levee equals my Gran's house is completely underwater. Hurricane Katrina hit home and I lived in Dallas...
I went through a ton emotions until that October when Christopher and I traveled down to New Orleans to help get what we could out of her house. Seeing her house made everything a little more real and hurt allot more. The house that I spent hours sitting at the dinning room table listening to stories of the Great Depression, World War II and how my grandfather built the house they lived in by hand, was just a beaten and battered shell of what it used to be. Furniture was tossed around as if it was doll house props thrown into place by an angry child. Trees were bent like little toothpicks; while others were gracefully plucked from the ground and tossed across streets for all the world the see their elaborate root system that once gave them life. I had never seen the world so gray, the lack of color in everything was astonishing.
And while that chapter in our lives is coming to a close with family moved out of the city and property sold off, I can look back and say that everything happens for a reason. My grandmother is alive and well in her new home in Houston - only a four hour drive from us where she gets to see Ethan more than she would had she stayed in New Orleans. My cousin moved to Dallas for a better job and now lives a stones throw from Christopher and I , and we worked as a family to help each one of us get through something we never thought we would have to. Our family is built on strength, love and determination and one day I hope Ethan will know the strength family and friends can give you. Ethan got his name from Hurricane Katrina. The name Ethan means "strong leader" and his middle name is Webster, my grandmother's maiden name. She's a strong force in the world that at the age of 86 she had to start over with a new home, new city and new surroundings. Yet she did it. With the help of her children, grandchildren and her dog Tinker, she did it.
Christopher and I pray for those people who are still trying to rebuild their lives in the cities brought down by Katrina. And we pray that one day we can take Ethan to the city where I was born and show him a great and beautiful city I used to call my second home. Long Live New Orleans!
I went through a ton emotions until that October when Christopher and I traveled down to New Orleans to help get what we could out of her house. Seeing her house made everything a little more real and hurt allot more. The house that I spent hours sitting at the dinning room table listening to stories of the Great Depression, World War II and how my grandfather built the house they lived in by hand, was just a beaten and battered shell of what it used to be. Furniture was tossed around as if it was doll house props thrown into place by an angry child. Trees were bent like little toothpicks; while others were gracefully plucked from the ground and tossed across streets for all the world the see their elaborate root system that once gave them life. I had never seen the world so gray, the lack of color in everything was astonishing.
And while that chapter in our lives is coming to a close with family moved out of the city and property sold off, I can look back and say that everything happens for a reason. My grandmother is alive and well in her new home in Houston - only a four hour drive from us where she gets to see Ethan more than she would had she stayed in New Orleans. My cousin moved to Dallas for a better job and now lives a stones throw from Christopher and I , and we worked as a family to help each one of us get through something we never thought we would have to. Our family is built on strength, love and determination and one day I hope Ethan will know the strength family and friends can give you. Ethan got his name from Hurricane Katrina. The name Ethan means "strong leader" and his middle name is Webster, my grandmother's maiden name. She's a strong force in the world that at the age of 86 she had to start over with a new home, new city and new surroundings. Yet she did it. With the help of her children, grandchildren and her dog Tinker, she did it.
Christopher and I pray for those people who are still trying to rebuild their lives in the cities brought down by Katrina. And we pray that one day we can take Ethan to the city where I was born and show him a great and beautiful city I used to call my second home. Long Live New Orleans!
Monday, August 27, 2007
Chemo: Round V
Today is round five in Christopher's chemo treatments and Dr. Kirby was very pleased with how the chemo is progressing. He said Christopher has signigifcant shrinkage of the cancer on his liver. There are three masses that they are keeping their eye on and using as their measuring sticks. They vary in size, the largest being roughly 8cm, and all three have shrunk about 1cm or more (but no more than 1.5cm). I was trying to figure out in my head what percent of shrinkage that was and if I had to make an educated guess, I would say between 5-10%.
Christopher will be on chemo for a few more months before he gets a break since everything is looking good. In roughly two more months Christopher will have another scan to see how much more shrinkage there is and I hope and pray that there is even more!
I wish I could throw out some number to show how much his CEA blood markers have dropped, but the lab is backed up and we don't have that much information yet. All we do know as of right now is that the Doctor is VERY PLEASED with his progress and told him to keep up the good work.
Thank you all for keeping us in your prayers and as soon as I know anything more, I'll pass it along!
CHEMO UPDATE: We got the CEA markers back (CEA test for tumor markers that are molecules occurring in blood or tissue that are associated with cancer and whose measurement or identification is useful in patient diagnosis or clinical management.)! Before chemo (july 3, 2007) his markers were at 3316 (up 500pt from when he was in the hospital), and as of today... 922. Yep 922, over a 70% drop. In the words of Christopher's doctor, "that's damn good!"
Christopher will be on chemo for a few more months before he gets a break since everything is looking good. In roughly two more months Christopher will have another scan to see how much more shrinkage there is and I hope and pray that there is even more!
I wish I could throw out some number to show how much his CEA blood markers have dropped, but the lab is backed up and we don't have that much information yet. All we do know as of right now is that the Doctor is VERY PLEASED with his progress and told him to keep up the good work.
Thank you all for keeping us in your prayers and as soon as I know anything more, I'll pass it along!
CHEMO UPDATE: We got the CEA markers back (CEA test for tumor markers that are molecules occurring in blood or tissue that are associated with cancer and whose measurement or identification is useful in patient diagnosis or clinical management.)! Before chemo (july 3, 2007) his markers were at 3316 (up 500pt from when he was in the hospital), and as of today... 922. Yep 922, over a 70% drop. In the words of Christopher's doctor, "that's damn good!"
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Drum Roll Please...
While I want to write a really long and sappy blog today, I have allot on my plate at work today. But can I have a drum roll please.... we got the results from Christopher's scan he took yesterday... the cancer is SHRINKING! Chemo is doing what it needs to do!
I'll try to write more details later, but I wanted to let everyone know!
I'll try to write more details later, but I wanted to let everyone know!
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Living Strong Means Living Strong for Those Around You
Yesterday I got an email from the Lance Armstrong Foundation entitled, "Living Strong Means Challenging Your Self" and at that time I thought what an amazing statement. So on the way home from work last night was thinking in my head what my next blog would be about and thought the title will be "Living Strong Means: Enjoying Life," and I would talk about our proofing session that we were going to do that night, how great the photos looked, how we enjoy each moment in life, etc.
However, by the end of the night my blog changed. A while back Deanna told me about a family who was also going through the journey of having a loved one with cancer. The Freeman's are a very strong family that need our prayers right now. Mr. Freeman is battling with cancer and the family has had some run of bad luck and they need our prayers and good thoughts channeled there way. Cindy Freeman and I have exchanged emails here and there and I am sure they would love to know that there are some people out there thinking of them.
You can read more about the Freeman's on Deanna's Blog - click here to read about The Freemans.
Today lets say a prayer for the Freeman family; today let's live strong for those around us; today lets live strong for the Freeman's.
However, by the end of the night my blog changed. A while back Deanna told me about a family who was also going through the journey of having a loved one with cancer. The Freeman's are a very strong family that need our prayers right now. Mr. Freeman is battling with cancer and the family has had some run of bad luck and they need our prayers and good thoughts channeled there way. Cindy Freeman and I have exchanged emails here and there and I am sure they would love to know that there are some people out there thinking of them.
You can read more about the Freeman's on Deanna's Blog - click here to read about The Freemans.
Today lets say a prayer for the Freeman family; today let's live strong for those around us; today lets live strong for the Freeman's.
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Chemo: Round IV
Tuesday was round four of Christopher's chemo treatments and I have to say that even with a crazy chemo day and our AC at home going out (which is now fixed), he has the presence of mind to look at the positive in all this.
So let me start with his day at chemo. Normally Christopher shows up, gives blood, sees the doctor and then starts chemo - this whole process before the chemo starts is roughly 20 minutes tops. Yesterday it took almost two hours to get to the chemo part of the day. He said a lady out in the parking lot passed out after her treatments and they ended up bringing her in, giving her oxygen and calling 911. Christopher said someone told him that they thought she might be having a heart attack and that she was in her 60's. (The heat here is getting too all of us.)
After getting the poor woman situated they called him back to start his chemo, where he was sat next to a gentleman that snored so loud the medical staff had to wake him because he was disturbing everyone else getting chemo. Christopher said he did entertain the idea of unplugging his machine, walking over to the guy, nugging him and saying, "Hey, rollover." But he thought the nursing had it under control.
When I got home with Ethan, Ethan ran over to Christopher and gave his legs a hug. It was the greatest thing I ever saw and I could see Christopher grinning from ear to ear. And after a quick game of chase and giggle monster around the house it was dinner time. As we all sat around the dinner table (Ethan in his high chair), Christopher said this is "great" and I didn't have to ask what he meant. I knew what he was feeling because I was thinking the same thing, it was great to sit at our kitchen table and eat as a family and share in what happened over the course of one day together.
Here is the news on the Doctor's front: Christopher's red blood cell counts are up (which means the iron pill he's taking is working - wooo hoooo!) his white blood cell counts are down, but they are still in the normal range for him. Dr. Kirby says this is due to the chemo and he's not worried about it at this moment in time. Christopher was also told that his liver is not enlarge anymore. Since the end of May his liver has been rather enlarged and we were told this was due to the cancer. Now with his liver being normal size does this mean that the cancer is shrinking - we don't know and won't know that answer until the 20th when he gets his CT scan.
We are praying that soon we will have other news than blood cell counts to share with everyone and as soon as we know - we'll post it for everyone! Keep us in your prayers.
So let me start with his day at chemo. Normally Christopher shows up, gives blood, sees the doctor and then starts chemo - this whole process before the chemo starts is roughly 20 minutes tops. Yesterday it took almost two hours to get to the chemo part of the day. He said a lady out in the parking lot passed out after her treatments and they ended up bringing her in, giving her oxygen and calling 911. Christopher said someone told him that they thought she might be having a heart attack and that she was in her 60's. (The heat here is getting too all of us.)
After getting the poor woman situated they called him back to start his chemo, where he was sat next to a gentleman that snored so loud the medical staff had to wake him because he was disturbing everyone else getting chemo. Christopher said he did entertain the idea of unplugging his machine, walking over to the guy, nugging him and saying, "Hey, rollover." But he thought the nursing had it under control.
When I got home with Ethan, Ethan ran over to Christopher and gave his legs a hug. It was the greatest thing I ever saw and I could see Christopher grinning from ear to ear. And after a quick game of chase and giggle monster around the house it was dinner time. As we all sat around the dinner table (Ethan in his high chair), Christopher said this is "great" and I didn't have to ask what he meant. I knew what he was feeling because I was thinking the same thing, it was great to sit at our kitchen table and eat as a family and share in what happened over the course of one day together.
Here is the news on the Doctor's front: Christopher's red blood cell counts are up (which means the iron pill he's taking is working - wooo hoooo!) his white blood cell counts are down, but they are still in the normal range for him. Dr. Kirby says this is due to the chemo and he's not worried about it at this moment in time. Christopher was also told that his liver is not enlarge anymore. Since the end of May his liver has been rather enlarged and we were told this was due to the cancer. Now with his liver being normal size does this mean that the cancer is shrinking - we don't know and won't know that answer until the 20th when he gets his CT scan.
We are praying that soon we will have other news than blood cell counts to share with everyone and as soon as we know - we'll post it for everyone! Keep us in your prayers.
Saturday, August 11, 2007
A Great Start to Our Weekend
This has been one world wind of a week for Christopher and I. My work is picking up with several new projects on the horizon and Christopher is scheduling all of his CT scans and blood work for the month of August. And to top it all off, Ethan has gotten three molars to break through this week (and yes, he's let us know all about them) - this makes a total of 11 teeth for him!
As part of our chemo routine we try to do something fun the weekend before a treatment and this weekend was perfect, we celebrated with our neighbor's, their little girl's birthday. Ashley tuned the big number one and we couldn't be happier for her as she crosses this huge milestone in her life. Christopher and I like to joke to our selves that she's Ethan's girlfriend only because at his party, he followed her around every where - and I even think he tried to give her his toys (yep, I think he's smitten with her; however, as you can see from the photos - WHO WOULDN'T BE!) This was the first time Ethan was around more than the six children he plays with at day care and while he loved running around Marc & Lauren's house exploring his new surroundings and friends; he tuckered out rather quickly from all the excitement.
I have to share with you all something rather touching. After we showed up, Ashley's mummy, Lauren, introduced us to her Mom and the first words out of her mouth were, "Give me hug!" She was so full of love and life and shared with us how she prays for us and asks Lauren all the time how we are doing. I know I must have stood there with my mouth open and nothing coming out, it was so amazing to see someone who only knows us by a story and a possible finger point, "they live there on the corner," could care so much about us and the journey we are on.
I know I go on about how amazing people are, but you all are. Everyone we know touches us in so many different ways that I could go on FOREVER about it. We are so blessed to have our friends, neighbors and those that extend their hearts out to us in our lives. Thank you everyone from the bottom of our hearts.
The situation reminded me of a few lines in Nickleback's If Everyone Cared:
And as we lie beneath the stars
We realize how small we are
If they could love like you and me
Imagine what the world could be
Amen, I'm alive
And of course I couldn't keep the camera at home, here are some of the photos from Ashley's par'ta!
Her very own number one cake!
The birthday girl showing everyone how eating cake should be done!
Ethan and Reese enjoying the fun (look ma' it's in color! - sorry inside joke between me and my mother).
Ashley getting some birthday girl reading time from the boys!
And this little guy was too cute not to snap a few of him!
The birthday girl!
As part of our chemo routine we try to do something fun the weekend before a treatment and this weekend was perfect, we celebrated with our neighbor's, their little girl's birthday. Ashley tuned the big number one and we couldn't be happier for her as she crosses this huge milestone in her life. Christopher and I like to joke to our selves that she's Ethan's girlfriend only because at his party, he followed her around every where - and I even think he tried to give her his toys (yep, I think he's smitten with her; however, as you can see from the photos - WHO WOULDN'T BE!) This was the first time Ethan was around more than the six children he plays with at day care and while he loved running around Marc & Lauren's house exploring his new surroundings and friends; he tuckered out rather quickly from all the excitement.
I have to share with you all something rather touching. After we showed up, Ashley's mummy, Lauren, introduced us to her Mom and the first words out of her mouth were, "Give me hug!" She was so full of love and life and shared with us how she prays for us and asks Lauren all the time how we are doing. I know I must have stood there with my mouth open and nothing coming out, it was so amazing to see someone who only knows us by a story and a possible finger point, "they live there on the corner," could care so much about us and the journey we are on.
I know I go on about how amazing people are, but you all are. Everyone we know touches us in so many different ways that I could go on FOREVER about it. We are so blessed to have our friends, neighbors and those that extend their hearts out to us in our lives. Thank you everyone from the bottom of our hearts.
The situation reminded me of a few lines in Nickleback's If Everyone Cared:
And as we lie beneath the stars
We realize how small we are
If they could love like you and me
Imagine what the world could be
Amen, I'm alive
And of course I couldn't keep the camera at home, here are some of the photos from Ashley's par'ta!
Her very own number one cake!
The birthday girl showing everyone how eating cake should be done!
Ethan and Reese enjoying the fun (look ma' it's in color! - sorry inside joke between me and my mother).
Ashley getting some birthday girl reading time from the boys!
And this little guy was too cute not to snap a few of him!
The birthday girl!
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